How to hide porn like a champ.

Good news!! You don't have to download and delete porn every time you feel like rubbing one out. You can have a giant porn collection on your home computer and it will be completely stealth to any parental figure. Just do this:

1. Ceate a folder in c:/windows/system and name it something computer illiterate people find scary. Use words like 'protocol_21' or 'tcp_settings' or 'backUpOffMyPr0nBiatch'.

2. Load it plum full of your favorite jerkoff material.

3. In your 'Windows Folder Options,' uncheck the box next to 'hide known file extensions.'

4. Rename the files and give them new extensions. It helps to have a system where you know what extension to change the name back to. What I do is reverse it. (i.e. 'mpg' renames to 'gpm', avi to iva, etc...)

If you have a huge collection, it will suck to go through and rename each file one at a time. To change multiple filenames at once, open command prompt and use this line:

c:/windows/system/_protocol
rename *.mpg *.gpm
rename *.avi *.iva
rename *.asf *.fsa

Your parents, even if they manage to find the sacred folder, will see a bunch of esoteric system files instead of 'Granny Tranny' and 'Midget Digits.' That's how it's done. If you have any questions, email me. Another important factor is how to hide the spunk, but that's a completely different story.

Last updated November 19th, 2004