Why are blowup dolls so ugly?

Here's a typical inflatable fuck doll.

She looks like a frog princess with downs syndrome.

She has rashes painted around her ears, she has no eyelids, and her hair makes her look like a Klingon.

If a living human looked anywhere like this, the only sex she'd get would be with other exhibits in the museum.

This one has has no holes. It's a blow-up doll that you can't have sex with. What are you supposed to do? Watch a movie together? Talk to her? Rub her on your head and stick her to the ceiling?

This girl's bitching at me and she has a webbed crotch and I hate her.

She looks like one of those punching bags you hit when you were a kid, and they bob back up again. Except this one has a giant lubricated mouth. So you accidentally punch her in the throat right when your dad walks in and he thinks you're fisting a fuck doll that looks like Stewie Griffin.

I call this one Dicky Long Cocking. They went all out with the makeup on her.

This doll looks like such a slut, even if she were brand new, I'd still wear a condom.

And despite the hard work on her makeup, she still doesn't have eyelids. Is there something unattractive about eyelids? Her eyes look like eukaryotes. I don't want to jizz onto a eukaryote. That is bad news. A eukaryote, once jizzed on, will absorb your genetic code and evolve into a giant horny beast and now you're the fuck doll.

This isn't a blow-up girl as much as it is a girl I want to blow up.

I hate her. Her name is Contessa, but people call her Tessa. Which is fortunate for someone as unclever as I am, because it was not a very far reach to come up with "Hey, cunt-Tessa"

She's retarded. This picture is probably as philosophical as she gets.

The reason she pisses me off is because she's slutty, alcoholic, and extremely gullible, and I'm slutty, alcoholic, extremely manipulative. Yet, despite the odds working heavily in my favor, I can't get her in the sack. So I'm getting revenge by defaming her character in front of the internet.

Your move, cunt.

No eyelids, as usual. This time with bruises on her cheeks, a terrified expression, and two black eyes. Yet, for some reason, they didn't call this doll the Rape-me-Susan.

This isn't funny. This is creepy as fuck. Stay away from me and my website and my life.

I don't know if I should fuck her shoulder blades or embalm her into a sarcophagus. These blowup dolls aren't hot. I don't see what's so difficult about it.

This girl looks extremely lifeless. She could be a doll. Or real. I'd fuck her either way.

She's hot, by the way. In case you didn't notice. If that's a fuck doll, that's a pretty damn hot fuck doll. Hats off to whoever crafted that one.

The problem with this one is that her shniz looks like a belt buckle. Maybe if my dick were 32 inches, flat, and made of rawhide, she'd be the sex toy for me.

For all the guys who have fetishes for fucking girls in the belly button.

She has a fat lumpy ass with fucked up boobs. Her boobs look like those little paper cone cups at water coolers.

And instead of shaping the material to make a chin, they painted a black line. Now she's chinless bearded frumpy-ass Giza tit plastic slut doll. Not my style. Not anyone's style.

You know it's bad news when a blowup doll is so ugly that you have to put a bag over her head.

Maybe I'll forget about dolls and get a girlfriend and come back in five years to see if they've made any improvements.